I think I’ve gone into a full blown tantrum. Firstly, I’ve got a big report due in on Thursday and in true University style, I’ve left it all to the last minute, so that’s stressing me out. And, secondly because Mike has gone and left me on my own for 2 weeks. I literally can’t function alone and tonight it ended in tears when I got lost going to my NCT class (we’ve only been there 4 times before!). I took a wrong turn down a one way street and when a woman came round the corner in the opposite direction, instead of reversing just a wee bit to let me get past so I could turn around (and despite my attempts/pleas for her to do this) she insisted on making me reverse back onto the main road. Does she not know I’m unhinged at the moment and liable to get stabby (to quote a school mate, Miss Rubery, from a Facebook post earlier today!).
Lady in car, if you are out there, you are mean and you made a pregnant woman cry with your meanness! I hope there is such a thing as Karma.
Anyway, I mainly cried because Mike wasn’t there with me, I miss him and that wouldn’t have happened if he had been there. Plus, I was still lost.
Other than that, NCT was breastfeeding day! Urgh. I’m now slightly terrified at the prospect. So, for Mike’s benefit for having missed it, here are the highlights:
- Eat what you like! It’s a myth that you shouldn’t eat or drink certain foods while breastfeeding – including spicy food or broccoli or, my personal favourite, alcohol! Apparently only a minute amount crosses to the milk. To quote the lady, as she so eloquently put it, you don’t need to ‘pump and dump’ your milk after a night out (although you probably wouldn’t want to get totally bladdered still!). Hooray!
- Cooling Cabbage – After the first few days after the baby’s born, it may not want to feed but your boobs will likely be full to bursting. To sooth your sore boobs and suppress the production of milk put a refrigerated savoy cabbage leaf in your bra. I bet you didn’t think I was going to say that. There’s apparently a chemical in the leafy green that does both those things (suppress and sooth). Bit cheaper than anything you’ll find in Boots.
- Skin to skin – babies find being skin to skin extremely soothing and it even helps to regulate the heartbeat. It doesn’t need to be just Mum that does this, Dad can do it too. It can also help if you’re struggling with breastfeeding to almost ‘reset’ the baby, like starting from scratch again – if you lie at a 45 degree angle with the baby directly on your skin, head on your chest, feet down, it may start to route around (i.e. look for your boob) and get latched on properly (I believe some more research is probably needed for this one).
- 6 is the magic number – it seems that things should start to settle down around the 6 week mark. This is often a time when mum’s might give up on breastfeeding because they think they aren’t producing enough milk but in actual fact their baby is going through a growth spurt, so they need to feed more in order for your boobs to catch up and start producing more.
- Express yourself - if you do want to start expressing your milk ready for a night away (or in my stupid case a whole week of working during the day in Vienna when the baby’s only 8 weeks old – Mike and babe are coming too but it will certainly be interesting), you should start expressing every day at the same time to trick your boobs into making more milk so you have it when you need it. The good news is that the milk will last for 8 days in the fridge!
- Words I don’t want to hear again – engorged and suckling at the breast. I heard them a few too many times tonight and I like neither.
There were loads more points (as you can imagine what with it being a 2 hour session) but these were my favourites. I left feeling a little bit anxious, mainly due to my work trip and how I’m going to express enough milk each day. But also because I think I’ve been putting unrealistic expectations on my weight loss after the baby is born.
Until now I hadn’t really thought about the fact that the little muncher could be wanting a feed every 2 hours (that’s 2 hours after it first starts feeding, so you might only get half an hour off at a time if it’s hungry!) and generally I’m going to entirely knackered/foggy headed. Once I’ve written this freaking report I’m going to write a menu plan for Mike, including instructions for juices, so that hopefully I can eat really healthily despite all the fog. You wait, I’ll be slapping the green juice out of his hands and insisting on an Egg McMuffin.
Are there any mum’s out there that can put me at ease a bit? Please pass on any tips you have for getting through those first few weeks… Did you try and lose weight during this period? Or am I kidding myself? Where’s Posh when you need her?!
I should point out that I totally understand that those first few weeks/months are amazingly precious and I would never put weight loss before bonding with mini-mike but if it is possible to do both, I’d like to know about it!
Image courtesy of Peterborough and Stamford Hospitals
14 comments
Amy Metcalf on 7-4-2012 at 6:41 pm
And breathe… No new mum wants to be a massive fatty for months and months on end but at the end of the day,we’ll have been through a massive stress on the body so we need time to recover too and not worry about counting calories. Eat sensibly and try and do gentle exercising if you feel up to it. I am imagining that I’m going to feel like I’ve been knocked sideways once Baby M (finally) decides to make an appearance. Yes I have got lots of healthy (ish) meals planned but if I need to eat something quick and not one of my five a day, I probably will. Also I am starting to feel more and more that NCT classes really force breastfeeding upon us,although it could just have been the lady who took my class..she even looked down on me (how when I’m 5’11 and towered over her,I’m unsure!) When I said that I would aim to breastfeed for a max of 6 months but that I wanted to also express milk so husband could do night feeds. Tsk.
Ooh that was long and rambling but don’t be so hard on yourself lovely xx
hannah on 7-4-2012 at 6:55 pm
Firstly, fab to hear from you – was thinking about you earlier and wondering if baby had arrived yet! No, being the answer, sorry hun xx
Secondly, everything you say is right – I think I just thought it would be easier then it actually will be. I’m hoping that if we plan for the worst it’ll be better than that!
Thirdly, your NCT teacher sounds like a bellend. Ours was quite happy to talk about both methods and pointed out the positives of bottle feeding too – including that it gives dad bonding time too (they can do skin to skin too then). I’m totally going to be expressing so Mike can help (at night!!). I’ve no idea when I’ll stop feeding – 6 months or more/less, it depends on baby bean. Gunna play that one by ear. if this baby is anything like me, it’ll be HUNGRY!
Thanks darling, and ramble away! xxx
hannah on 7-4-2012 at 6:57 pm
I got this great message from a friend, Naomi, on Facebook in response to this, which I thought I’d share:
Interesting, I only did my nCT class 10 months ago and there are a few differences (and loads of similarities!) Breastfeeding is amazing for those that can. I’m still fully feeding Bo at 8 months but it is difficult at the beginning. Bo wasn’t interested in feeding for the first day so much, which is apparently normal. Then the milk came through (oh my word) on day 3… Ouchies. I was told count to 10 to get through the pain when they first start feeding but I found 30pm seconds more appropriate! It’s not great at the start but so worth it Hannah. You will not be able to keep a straight face when you’re literally squirting milk in your baby’s face because you’re so ‘engorged’ (there it is again) – it’s laugh or cry! As for the weight, I didn’t try to lose it, breast feeding just seemed to help it fall off… Just the flab to get rid of now! x
Ania on 7-4-2012 at 7:33 pm
Agree, pain but not for everyone. I only made it through 10 days with both of mine, each time bleeding by the end and couldnt take it any more. Saw numerous breastfeeding councillors and they ran out of ideas! BUUUUTTTTTT, I know all three of the friends I’m still in touch with from NCT did it fine. Two of them with no pain or problems at all, not even in the first days. I (and another failing breastfeeder friend of mine) put it down to my having tiny boobs so you’ll be fine dude
. Also don’t feel guilty or worried about giving the odd bottle of formula if it helps you guys get by. The two successful breastfeeding NCT buddies did that from day 1 and their bos didn’t get confused and did combine until 5 months old, then had no trouble weaning off boob.
Also I felt like I wasn’t even bothered about losing weight in the first couple of months so I wouldn’t worry about that hun…
You’re going to be amazing…xxx
Oh and curses on the wench in the one way street
Amy Metcalf on 7-4-2012 at 7:34 pm
I know – one of my friend’s told me to stop eating naughty food (have constantly craved burgers which has given me super duper iron levels.lol) as I’ll hate having to diet once she’s here. I did point out that I wasn’t going to pop her out and revert back to a size 12/14 straight away as before pregnancy I was doing a bootcamp 3 times a week and biking 6 miles everyday to work so I know it’ll be hard work. Am hoping with breast feeding, that the weight won’t stick around forever.
NCT teacher was a bit of a bellend. She stated a lot of crap really and I think wanted everyone to be breastfeeding forever more.
That was a good message from Naomi. One of the girls in my group has stopped breastfeeding after 2 weeks as she found it so painful. Poor girl felt really guilty too though which personally I think is down to awful NCT woman. I will defo keep in mind what Naomi said though..and also giggle when my milk comes in.lol xxxx
Ania on 7-4-2012 at 8:00 pm
Amy, there’s definitely a lot of guilt piled on from health care professionals (midwives/health visitors/NCT advisers even my GP) I was distraught for the first 2 weeks of bottle feeding. I had a lot of ‘oh that’s a shame’ and ‘have you tried X, Y, Z’ (which of course I had) Still now, I get grief from my Auntie about stopping breastfeeding so early and my son is 3! The best advice I had was from a good friend who had been there and done it and she told me to do what was best for the whole family not just what everybody supposes to be ‘best’ for baby. That turned out to not be bleeding all over my kid’s face whilst we both sobbed for an hour each time trying to get the latched on. Not everyone can do it that’s why there are wetnurses all over the world and formula is amaaaazing stuff. Both my kids are really healthy happy and it was quite liberating to give up feeding once I accepted i wasn’t a rubbish mum. All that said, I have mega respect for anyone who breastfeeds and especially those that do find it painful initially but find a way to make it work.
I also rekon that as well as external/social pressure to feed there’s a switch that flicks inside you when feedng your baby that makes you feel like you have to keep going. Even with Lara I felt the same emotions as first time around despite knowing how well Lucian did on the bottle..
sorry for mega long comments!! This is a topic that gets me ranting and emotional!
hannah on 7-4-2012 at 8:20 pm
Ah, boobs, what are they like?!
Thanks for your comments Annie – I had you in mind when I was writing this. Thanks for your encouragement, I am terrified at what will happen – you’ve only just pushed the thing out of that tiny hole when you then have to tackle the mother of all touchy subjects, breastfeeding! I think regardless what happens there’s going to be tears (to go with my tears of the fanny kind!).
BTW I know people with massive knockers who’ve struggled too – it’s just one of life’s mysteries – But at least you’ve proven that it’s alright to bottle feed, the little dude’s going to be fine either way
Oh and Amy, I’m staying at my parent’s at the moment and there is chocolate in every direction you look so there’s no way i’m giving up the naughty stuff, at least for the next 2 weeks and despite my best efforts!
xx
Amy Metcalf on 7-4-2012 at 8:37 pm
I think it’s awful the amount of pressure that is put on breastfeeding. The amount of cruddy “studies” that have supposedly said all these things that your babe will suffer from if they aren’t breastfed! I was fed for 3 months and I was never overweight growing up,didn’t suffer from any ailments and certainly haven’t suffered height wise being almost 6 foot so it drives me nuts when guilt is piled on to new mums. Am of the thinking,if I can breastfeed,brilliant. If I can’t, as you say, formula is so good now,they’ll be getting all the nutrients they need
xx
Han – glad to hear it. Noone will judge you eating a slab of chocolate in one sitting..or is that just me that’s done that?!
xxx
Diane on 7-13-2012 at 1:27 pm
Breast feeding is great!! and there is no other way that you can burn 500 calories a day just by sitting down!
xxx
hannah on 7-16-2012 at 9:51 am
Sounds like a winner to me!! Fingers crossed it all come naturally to me and baby – apparently I was very good at feeding (and sleeping!), so I’m hoping mini-Mike is too. Thanks Diane xxx
Sarah on 7-17-2012 at 10:41 am
Hello! Sorry to just come invading your blog – I found you through a Nuby Facebook post and am a bit hooked on your blog at the moment! Regarding breast feeding have you signed up to the Cow and Gate mum and baby/bump mailing club? I know they sent me a very informative leaflet on the pros and cons of both breast and bottle. So I’d you aren’t you might find some more help from mums over there!
S
And it is true that breast feeding will help the baby weight fall off – as well as help the post labour uterus back to it’s normal size.
Just keep reminding yourself that your boobs were made for your baby – rather than fretting if you’ll have problems! If you were to struggle with nursing baby, then there are other options there for you, and there are people to help you – you are never going to be alone in the deep end! Best of luck with your little bundle
hannah on 7-17-2012 at 10:20 pm
Hi Sarah, thanks so much for your comment and I’m glad you’re finding stuff of interest
Regarding the cow and gate breast feeding club, I hadn’t heard about it so that’s really useful, I’ll get signed up.. I’m hoping to go on another class towards the end of the month – if I get my act together – to learn more about it (plus I hear they have knitted boobs to practice with – now that I’ve got to see!). So I’ll do another post and hopefully ‘feed’ in any other tips I get from cow and gate!
I totally agree with what you say about not fretting – I think the more relaxed about things you can be, the more chance of success you’ll have.
And I shall remind Mike that whatever he may think… my boobs were made for our baby!
Thanks again hxx
Holly on 8-8-2012 at 6:43 pm
Hi, sorry I was just stalking your blog and this caught my eye. If you’re hoping to breastfeed PLEASE don’t sign up to things like Cow & Gate’s baby club. Formula companies are terrible for subliminal advertising and underhand methods of sabotaging breastfeeding. They win your trust with all the “breast is best, here are some tips to help you” stuff (which they have to legally do, and their advice is really awful) and then slip in undermining things along the way that people don’t notice.
I am speaking as a birth professional and mum of 2 soon to be 3, one (unfortunately) formula fed and one still breastfeeding as a 1yo.
You wouldn’t take advice on how to select the best independent grocery store from Tesco and for the same reason you should not take advice from the people who stand to profit from women not managing to breastfeed. It is a terrible conflict of interest and the formula industry are known for very poor ethics.
These “feeding clubs” violate the World Health Organisation code of marketing breastmilk substitutes on many levels (a code put in place to protect mums and babies) and a lot of work is being done to try and get them to stop… but until then pleeease I beg of you don’t fall for it!
Phew sorry, as you can see I feel passionate about this topic. Otherwise best of luck with breastfeeding hun, it can be a tough road but speaking as someone who’s done both, once you get over those early hurdles breastfeeding is SO much easier. Going out with a bottle fed baby is like planning a military mission! Hold on to that thought, and see if there are any local La Leche League groups as they are very supportive, NCT groups similarly if they do ongoing postnatal stuff around you, or ask your midwife for advice about local breastfeeding cafes etc. Good luck – you’ll be great!
Sarah on 7-18-2012 at 1:37 am
Well better late than never to find out! They have 24/7 support for expectant/new mums too so they’re definitely worth a try! Gosh how much do I sound like an advert! Well best of luck – can’t wait to hear how your class goes! S x