It’s kind of obvious but new year is a great opportunity to look back at the year just gone and think about the future. The lovely thing about having a blog is that you can look back and see exactly what you were thinking about this time last year and also what you had hoped for the coming year.

My thoughts were all around my four month old baby – when will he sleep through the night, I’m ready to start thinking more about work but can I really start to leave him more? And what about breastfeeding? I was ready to move on and start fading it out but what would my family think and society at large? It’s one thing to not be able to breastfeed but another all together to choose not to! We overcame our/my hurdles and, of course, and the process wasn’t that bad.

I was reminded countless times that one thing that plagues you now will soon be long forgotten and replaced with something new. And, the plague now? Fussy eating.

Reuben really took to weaning and would eat anything I put in front of him from carrots to quinoa, apricots to avocado. He loved eating. Now, however, he will hardly eat a thing, so his diet is incredibly samey – rice cakes, fruit (he will eat most fruit), bread, porridge, those little pasta shells when he’s in the mood (which does mean I can hide veg in the sauce) and sometimes scrambled eggs. This is the sum total of what he will eat and it has hit an all time low on holiday – he’s been living on banana, a bit of bread, rice cakes (although we’ve just ran out) and raisins.

At home it breaks my heart. I might not be able to run a hoover around my house but I can cook. I love it and it brings me a lot of joy to make delicious and healthy things for my family. So, if I’m being honest, I feel like a failure that I can’t tempt him to eat and I’ve been in tears countless times over a plate of food that has been thrown across the floor.

Of course this is just another one of those hurdles to face, it may last longer than the sleeping through the night problem but I have to remind myself that despite how I feel, he’s not going to be a 25 year old eating rice cakes.

We’re already seeing his independent streak (if you give him a piece of bread, he won’t have it but if he picks it himself, he will), so there will be techniques we can use to get him back into eating (which I’ve started to look into now…How to help fussy eaters eat!). I just need to discover what they are and already lots of the Mum’s Days Facebook likers have pointed me towards things to try and research.

So, yes, my little fella causes me anxiety but if one thing is for sure, he always will! I’m reading Graham Norton’s Agony Aunt book on holiday. I didn’t know he’d wrote an agony aunt column either but that’s what you get if you don’t read the Telegraph. Anyway, if I learnt one thing from his advice to parents, that is to let their children live their own lives – guide and educate but don’t force issues. I know Reuben is still very little but I think that advice still stacks up – he’s happy, healthy for the most part and too busy to sit and eat the beautiful (ish) meals I make for him. And what’s the main reason I want him to eat? So I don’t feel like a failure!

It’s not about me, it’s about him being happy and healthy, which he is. So I will continue to be consistent and work harder at putting more variety in front of him but I won’t force the issue. He’ll get there in his own time. In the meantime, we’ll be eating lots of these…

fussy eating