time flies when you're being a mum

21 Oct, 2020

3 years ago today I woke with the most brutal hangover. I had had SO much fun the night before with some lovely friends (@debs @Laura @jo) but in my wisdom had drunk a whole bottle of tequila. To myself. It was my drink of the moment because it was “low calorie”…not at THAT quantity!

Sober

I had no idea when I woke up that I was about to embark on a t-total lifestyle. I was sick of feeling like shit, having THAT conversation in my head about when to drink, how much, who with, etc. So I decided I’d give it a whirl.

I’d read an article called Are You Afraid to Quit Drinking and it had been percolating around my brain. I desperately didn’t want to drink and yet stopping felt like the hardest thing in the world… 
My friends would reject me, I’d be boring and never go out…what do people who don’t drink DO anyway?

But I had to try. Over the course of the week I read This Naked Mind: Control Alcohol, I slept a lot and the song “I feel free” went around my head as I slowly started to see the light. I AM free.

I missed my first 2 soberversaries, busy being preggers or looking after a small child, so this is the first year I’ve acknowledged it.

It’s not all been a walk in the park – it took a good 18 months to not feel self-conscious. And new scenarios (being single for example) often make me question the choice but generally I don’t think about booze. 

I do things like go to bed on time, and get up early so I can write. I have written a WHOLE kids book (40k words). And kids I don’t know have actually read it and told me THEY LIKE IT!!!!! I would never have done that if I was still drinking. I’m also really into yoga and connect with people properly (rather than assessing their party-going potential and then ditching if I don’t think it’s good enough…)

So this year I wanted to give myself a wee high five because it has been the hardest and best thing I have ever done for myself.

Lots of you have messaged me about drinking in the past, so I want you to know that I’m here if you want to talk. Whether you stop or not, I’m happy to talk about it!

Cheers!! (mine’s a fizzy water, thanks!)

3 years sober

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It's a new decade!

02 Jan, 2020

I started this blog back in January 2012, 8 years of chattering away but if I’ve learnt one thing, it’s that I love a resolutions post. It’s now 2020, a new decade so I feel a goals post coming on.

2020

My very first blog was basically list of goals; I was pregnant with our first child when I started Mums’ Days and I wanted to keep a record of that but also work towards a number of things before the big day came. I find it motivating to have something written down so I can keep track of my progress.

This blog has morphed many times since then; from pregnancy, to baby, to what do I do next type blog. For a while it was even an income stream and source of free stuff! But a consistent post has always been my latest goals.

Like this one or this or this! So, with that in mind (and since I’ve not written anything for AGES…) here are my goals for 2020.

2020 Goals

1. Finish Frog Boy (working title)

Back in November I had a bit of an existential crisis because I wasn’t doing anything creative and after a while that makes me feel sad. Since then I’ve made sure that I make time to write (I’ve been getting up at 5:15 every morning to journal and work on a kids’ book) and I’ve made as much progress in the last month and a half than I have since I started it back in 2016. My aim is to finish the first draft by the end of January.

2. Write another book

Everyone knows your first book is crap, so if I actually want to be any good, I’ll have to move straight onto the next book and write that one too. Fingers crossed by the end of 2020 I’ll have something that’s half decent and possibly publishable!

3. Work on my ‘Findability’

This is from Show Your Work, if you want to be found (in my case so my book/s can be published) you need to be findable!

Which is where this blog comes in. I haven’t blogged consistently for years as I no longer want to write about my kids. However, I still associate with Mums’ Days and feel close to the contents. I’ve always been truthful, and when I read a post back it feels like I’m reading my diary!  So, I now plan to use it to document my latest journey with book writing… another birth of sorts! It totally won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, but that’s OK, the right people should hopefully find it and enjoy it.

2020

I have a few other goals (as per the pic!) but those are the main ones. And as you’ll see, I’m a lover of daily habits – I don’t have loads of time, what with looking after a 13 month old baby full time, so it’s all about the routine for me.

“Establishing and keeping a routine can be even more important than having a lot of time.”

Austin Kleon, Steal Like an Artist

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a bit of the good stuff

08 Feb, 2019

It’s Friday! We made it. Phew, what a week of ups and downs. On a personal level it’s been a tough old week.

It was also jab day today and while the jab itself wasn’t so bad, Nancy’s got progressively grumpier 🙁 She’s currently sleeping on my lap after crying for about an hour. While she’s settled I’ve been looking back through the weeks’ photos. I thought it would be a nice opportunity to share some of the good bits. Our ‘weekly wins’!

My parents came to stay

Mike was away doing a winter survival mountaineering course in the lakes (as you do and perfect winter weather for it), so my parents came to stay. I’ve been seeing lots of my mum as she’s recently gone part time and comes to see us with her new found freedom (LOVE IT). But we hadn’t seen my dad since Boxing Day.

It was lovely catching up with him, building snowmen (there’s still a tiny snow lump in the garden now!) and going for Sunday lunch at our local.

weekly wins

I started blogging again

Well, you are reading this on my blog after all so not news but it is a win! I’ve missed blogging so it’s been fun to share some of the lighter side of life here on the blog. You can see each of the posts I’ve written here: Dear Diary, Reading, BOOTD and Breastfeeding.

We went to Spanish City

Mike was off so the intention was to go for a walk with the dog on the beach front. We weren’t really prepared though and didn’t have the right gear for the hoolie that was blowing…so we went to Spanish City instead. Ooh it’s lovely. We ate delicious brunchy stuff (bacon and avocado on toast) and took home cakes which we ate in the car. Heaven.

weekly wins

I did two exercise classes

It’s been about 12 months since I did any sort of proper exercise class so, as my mate Tanya put it, I did the 2 hardest ones at my local gym – body blitz and HIIT. I totally loved it though and have booked to go back next week. The nice thing about being able to say “I’ve just had a baby” is the instructor takes it a little easier on you as you have safe words like “ab-split” that you can say when you’re tired!

I’m easing in, OK?!

Nancy’s coming along lovely!

She’s just a delicious treat! And one who’s starting to move about a bit and get stronger. She’s loving a bit of tummy time (as long as she’s in the exact right mood of course) and she’s started to crane her neck to see what’s going on around her. Mainly to listen to her fog-horn brother!! Who she loves and the feeling is mutual. Aww 🙂

weekly wins

What have your weekly wins been?

I’d love to hear. Comment below or over on the Mums’ Days Facebook Page or Instagram.

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(because I'm tired)

08 Jan, 2019

I’m Grumpy!

Grumpy

Or is it overwhelmed? 

  1. The house is an ongoing challenge (this morning we had to empty the room we dump things in and feed the animals – that stuff’s got to go somewhere! – and then decide on where to put the washer and dryer. And do we want a sink? And what work surfaces? I know YOU would have already decided this stuff but it completely caught me by surprise that this was happening today!)
  2. I’ve got a load to do for Box Happy – I’m really pleased with what we have so far for the Feb Box (which is all about self-care and being your own Valentine – what I need a bit of too) but there’s still so much to do and just NO TIME!! Because…
  3. I have a newborn – it’s the broken sleep that does it!

Sleepy = grumpy

A few weeks ago Nancy was sleeping for a 6-7 hour stretch in the night, which meant I was getting that good quality sleep you need to feel human (I know lucky bugger). Now she’s going for a maximum of 2-3 hours and I can really feel the difference. I’m hoping it’s because she’s been poorly and not a sign of things to come. I’m the kind of person who needs a lot of sleep or the wheels fall off the whole operation. As is becoming obvious this week. So the thought of this being an ongoing thing is resulting in tears.

Routine Limbo

I’m in this constant limbo of trying to follow a routine because there is this hope that with a routine they’ll sleep through sooner… (I loosely followed Tizzy Hall’s Save Our Sleep with Reuben because I liked knowing what I was meant to be doing – so Ive been using that again) only for Nancy to completely do her own thing. I try to wake her at 7 for a feed but she’ll snack then sleep until 8/8:30, which is when I’m meant to put her down for her morning nap…

But I’m also very aware that I don’t want to wish this time away. She will sleep through one day and she’s so gorgeous right now, I don’t want to waste a minute not enjoying her.
Grumpy

Looking after myself

I’m feeling pretty down on myself for not being back in my old jeans. Actually I am back in one pair but they’re bloody tight! I feel stupid for even saying it because I’m so proud of what my body’s done and been through. It’s the weight I’ve put on since having Nancy that’s the issue. Tiredness and busyness is resulting in poor eating choices. Plus I got on the scales…and a week after eating healthy vegetables (aka ones that haven’t been covered in butter or gravy) and not eating every hour, I didn’t lose a single pound. This worries me as I’ve 2 and half stone to lose. So, I feel like I’ve got quite a mountain to climb.

This quote we shared on the Box Happy social pages yesterday is perfect for me to remember right now. Again, I will get there and I don’t want to waste this precious time feeling bad about myself!

grumpy

I need to be sure I make some better choices and that no doubt comes down to not having to make choices at all. Meal planning and prepping when I’m not tired for example. Of course you’re going to grab a pizza if you’re hungry and knackered! We’re all human. But if you have something healthy and ready to go in the fridge, then you’re making life a lot easier for you and your extra love handles.

So that’s where I am right now! I’d love to hear any advice you have re routines and sleep deprivation and also meal prepping and self-care/love in these early days. Because they are still early days. I need to remember that! Come and join the conversation on the Mums’ Days Facebook Page or over on Instagram where I’ve been sharing a lot more stories since the NY 🙂

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Getting up crazy early!

06 Jun, 2018

26 days ago I started something that seemed utterly crazy but might just work. I started doing The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod. My friend, Clare, had recommended the book to me ages ago, so I bought it on Audible and then promptly forgot about it.

In between books, I finally remembered to listen to it last month as I was driving. I quickly decided it was awesome and totally up my street, so I started the very next day.

Miracle Morning

As I said to my friend Cath, who I bought this book for for her Birthday last month, this is a real cheese on toast book. But if you’re willing to listen to the message and give it a try, I think it could be a winner for so many different people. (more…)

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